Last we checked, being single wasn’t a disease and it definitely wasn’t fatal. Fat luck explaining that to people though!
Being single is less taxing than being in a relationship, they said. It is fun, they said. What you weren’t warned about was people’s complete inability to comprehend someone not needing a partner to validate their existence. If you’ve been single for a considerable amount of time, here are eight lines that have definitely come your way:
How are you still single?
Extremely easily. It comes as naturally as breathing. On a more important note, how are you still alive given your tendency to piss people off majorly with your nosiness?
But don’t you miss being with someone?
Perhaps I do, especially every time an old rerun of DDLJ comes on TV. On the whole though, I manage just fine. Singledom hasn’t been proved fatal yet, you know.
When I was your age, I was already married
And when I was your age, I wasn’t going around preaching how other people should lead their lives. You might want to give it a shot someday, just for fun.
You should really try online dating or Tinder
How about I just try minding my own business and you do the same? It’ll be amazing fun. Pinkie swear.
It’ll happen; don’t worry
Umm, I hate to say this but the only thing worrying here is everyone’s concern in my relationship status.
I can’t imagine what it is like to be single
And I can’t imagine what it must be like to be that nosy either, so there you go. That makes two of us.
Are you sure you aren’t dating someone secretly?
Seeing as there aren’t any secret CIA officers beating a path down to my door, why would I need to keep my relationship status a secret, pray do tell me?
But you and *insert random guy from high school* used to look so cute together!
‘Used to’ being the keyword. If I do want to get back together him, I will do so and in my own good time. The amount of concern and hours being dedicated to my love life is extremely touching though. How will I ever repay the favor?