Money buys everything, doesn't it?
Money is a utility and a measure of convenience that eludes many. We all strive for wealth, breaking a sweat, sometimes our back and more often than not, our morale. Life is no walk in the park for those with meager purses. Money holds a primary spot in our lives but is money enough to make relationships fulfilling? Is money enough to make someone smile or does genuine affection suffice?
Dear Urban Cupid,
I am a 23 year old man and I’m working with a start up advertising agency. I’m in a pretty dismal situation because I don’t make too much money (but I love my job) and my girlfriend is an outgoing, trigger happy spendthrift sort of a person. As is popularly known, advertising executives with naught for experience, especially in start ups, making a pittance for a living. I am one of those passionate executives. I manage my expenses just fine and am quite comfortable. My only problem is that my girlfriend constantly complains about the fact that I don’t do anything romantic for her and I don’t take her out at all. She thinks that I have lost interest in her and keeps nagging me. While we were in college, I had enough allowance from my family to help me indulge her but now, I’m trying to be self sufficient so I can’t succumb to her demands. I can’t find it in my heart to tell her that I can’t afford her lifestyle. What should I do?
It seems to me that you’re stuck between a rock and a hard place. As you rightly mentioned the advertising industry or for that matter, the media and communications sector in our country isn’t aptly organized, just yet and therefore, the flunkies and freshers bear the brunt of underpaying, over expecting conglomerates and agencies. The fact remains that people like you stick it out because of the passion and love they have for their jobs. Having said that, you mentioned that you manage your expenses just fine and are surviving comfortably.
What I decipher from your girlfriend’s behavior is that she is so used to you doting on her, since your privileged college days, that she’s finding it difficult to cope with your budgetary restraints. If you want your relationship to stand the test time, you will need to have a conversation with her about your financial situation and your plans for the future. Explain your position but try to allocate some amount every month to take her out on a date. You don’t have to make grand gestures or buy extravagant gifts to make her happy. Take her out for a movie she has been wanting to watch, take her for a bite to her favorite street food vendor or better still, put on your chef’s apron and cook her a lovely meal; throw in some candles and music for good measure. It doesn’t take a lot to make someone feel special, it doesn’t even take anything out of your wallet, it’s just a matter of making an effort.
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