We hear that the movie is named Kites because it is about people who, um, drift apart. Wow. Deep, and everything. Except it would take a tornado for Hrithik Roshan to drift anywhere, but I am sure Rakesh Roshan already knows that.

An inside source close to the family told us that he tried to beam Hrithik up during the making of Koi Mil Gaya and failed miserably. (He was supposed to page Jadoo and say “Beam me up, Hottie”, while Jadoo made kissie faces at the screen. Yeah, we doubt the parentage of Krrish too, we do.)

In Kites, Hrithik plays a salsa dancer, for which he is being trained by a man named, hold your breath, Flexy Stu. Funny, that’s exactly what they used to call this girl in my college, and it had nothing to do with dancing.

- By AJ

Oh. I wonder what prompted her to do that. Not the failed Kidnap, surely? She didn’t look that bad, I mean, Kareena Kapoor was much worse in Tashan, with her shoulder blades jutting out like that.

Lamba didn’t looked as ugly, she just looked… odd. Kinda like what will be produced if the Mango Mood man and a lump of clay mated… keep her under your reading lamp for too long, and she will melt into a puddle of poop.

Not to be mean, or anything. Her new movie is called Abba ka Kuan, conveniently so, because if it doesn’t work, Lamba can doob marofy in it. Like they said in the scriptures, ashes to ashes, puddle of poop to puddle of poop.

- By AJ